Emily F. Tali P. lesson record/reactions for 2/10

Emily F. Tali P. lesson record/reactions for 2/10:
E: Did you practice your breathing exercises this week?
T: Yeah, I did, and I took notes. 
E: Wow, that's awesome!
T: I learned how it feels to "puff out your gut". I can definitely do that. I've been practicing like when I sing in church. It's not like I'm breathing from my gut, it's just that the "push" came from somewhere stronger than my chest. So that was cool. [Note: I have never told her to "push" out anything, or to "puff out her gut!" And I didn't respond yet, because she was reading her notes, so I didn't want to stop or correct her yet.] When I did that, I didn't get light-headed, tight, or strained, but when I would start singing I didn't do that, so it's obviously not a habit. But I know how to do it. So you said to pay attention to my breathing when I lie down to sleep, and I noticed that breathing was deep, quiet, and lungs are full. When I exercise, I breathe in through my nose, out my mouth, and I'm not gasping. Ok. When I've been practicing, my neck feels tight, and that's not comfortable.
E: Practicing breathing?
T: Practicing songs. And I have a few questions. Why is my neck hurting when I practice? How do I hold my core when I'm not sucking in air--do I keep it puffed out or do I keep it tight? And how do I take a silent deep breath?
E: Those are good questions! Your neck is probably getting tight because of tensions and those can be from anywhere. Your whole body is involved when you sing, so I need to watch you more, but you might be pulling your neck back, pushing it forward, there could be general stiffness. I'd recommend when you practice singing that you do some tension relieving stretches. You can roll your head forward and stretch your neck. Just let your head sit on top of your neck. Your vertebrae are all stacked up nice and neat to support your head, so you don't need to "hold" it up with your muscles, but we forget these things. Why don't you try that now? Just feel a kind of "bobble-head" on top of your neck. It's hard to be able to maintain looseness up here and strength in your lower body. The idea is to be as free and released as possible when we sing. Another thing could be if you jut your jaw forward when you sing, or if you clamp down with your jaw, that can affect your neck. [We talked about the jaw hinge and how it works.]
T: So my neck tension could be related to jaw tension?
E: Yeah.
T: That's interesting, because I really like how I sound when I sing just "uh" with my jaw really loose.
E: Yeah, those are some possibilities, but I'll just need to watch you more. Ok. What were your other questions?
T: Um, how do I hold my core when I'm not sucking in air?
E: Ok. Yeah, that's the thing. The idea is not to "suck in" air, but to allow air to come in. [We discussed the anatomy and physiology of the lungs, diaphragm, and visceral displacement again.] And when you breathe in, you don't need to have anything going on down here. (abdomen) No engagement, or squeezing, or pulling or pushing. When you sing, it's going to feel a lot more energized down there. So it does take some coordination and practice to feel that give and take. So when you practice breathing, I encourage you to think, "Oh, air's just going to come into my body. I don't need to do anything!" So if everything is tight in your abdomen when you're breathing in, you won't be able to allow as much air to come in because of the way the diaphragm works. [another description of visceral displacement, and Tali was taking copious notes]
T: So, how does that feel?
E: Well, to me, it feels like I'm not hanging onto anything, and like I'm just letting my guts fall out. And I have way more guts than you, so it might be harder for you to feel that! Experiment with that some and see what you feel and what works for you, because it's kind of hard to explain.
T: Ok.
E: So, how is your voice feeling today? Are you almost over your cough?
T: Yeah, it's feeling pretty good. I'm getting frustrated with lip buzz lately because since you said not to clench my teeth, I'm not able to get that power. It's coming from somewhere else and I feel like I'm pushing with my neck or something. 
E: That's ok. We can take a break from it. I don't want you to stress over any particular exercise. In fact, if something isn't feeling good, do something else! We only need to do the exercises that are going to help you. There's always something else we can do. And I want to apologize, too, because last week I probably took you higher than I should have with your cold. Let's try some "hey Mom!" [I modeled a few and she followed, in register 2. I asked her to do some in her little girl voice, and she did a lovely mixed register one. It was great! I complimented her on it. I asked her to go higher till she was comfortable. She did a few that were wonderfully connected and clear, and I found the pitch on the piano, F#5.] That was a really good F#! We tried hum-chew last time, right? Did you practice it?
T: We did it, but I didn't practice because I didn't write it down. [We did several without specific pitch, then I asked her to do it on 54321 beginning on G4, then A4, B4. She looked like she was straining a bit, so we went back to G4, F#4, F4.] Is this to loosen my jaw? [She started stretching out and palpating her jaw. I encouraged her to continue that, asked if she noticed the muscles that move all the way up in her skull when she moved her jaw. I asked her to "uh" and yawn. We practiced a few yawns.]  When I practiced "Panis Angelicus" I practiced on [a] and that felt really good. [u] was good too. 
E: Good. Ok. I want you to try this: [I asked her to gently place a finger on her chin with her mouth open, the finger just to remind her that her chin was going to stay in the same place, and to speak ni-ne-na-no-nu, just articulating with her tongue. I modeled it, including while I was talking, and she thought that was pretty funny. She did a few, started on G4 by herself and did a descending line. I matched her pitch on the piano, and since it was good, moved up to G#4.] Did you feel your jaw moving on that one?
T: You don't want me to move it at all?
E: I don't want you to be stiff, but let's just see if it will hang there. [I modeled again, while I explained that she could try speaking with a hanging jaw, but that some letters would obviously pose a challenge. She thought it was funny again. She did some more, and it was better. We moved up to Bb4, A4.] Practice that on your own, but don't spend a ton of time on it. You want a challenge? Let's try [tu-to... a descending octave scale with a major third flip up on each note. I modeled because I couldn't play it, but gave her starting pitches, beginning on A4. I decided to give her ti-tu to see if that would help her with focus in her sound, and moved to Bb4. She was a little careful, but did have some good connection. I asked her to make it kid-like and simple, not pretty at B4. It was better. We moved to C5, and I gave her permission to flip her hand back on the ascending thirds to just let it fly. It was looking a little strained and I noticed her shoulders rolled in with neck pushed forward. We went back down to B4.] Ok. I'm seeing your shoulders slightly rolled in and your neck forward. [I showed her what she was doing, and I taught her "toaster shoulders". I made sure to differentiate between this and rolling or pushing her shoulders back. I encouraged her to do a few reps at a time a few times a day. I asked her to practice bobble-head with a "stupid" jaw to see how the head and jaw can move separately. I taught her the alignment exercise, with arms up and back. I had her do "toaster shoulders" and we went back to the vocalize, beginning on A4.] That one sounded stronger to me. How did that feel to you?
T: Yeah, it felt good. [We went to "Panis Angelicus".]
E: What's hard in this song?
T: I'm struggling with getting the right breaths. I feel like I'm taking too many breaths. 
E: Ok, I'll ask you. If you're watching someone sing, would you rather them get through a whole phrase and then gasp when they're done, or just take comfortable breaths whenever they need?
T: Ok, yeah, I'd rather see them just breathe.
E: Yeah, it might not be ideal, but for now, take breaths when you need. [We started at a tougher part of the song. She was airy, tense, and flat. I asked her to open her jaw as far as she could, explaining that this was extreme, and had her sing on [a]]. Did that feel different to you?
T: I really liked being able to have my jaw that open! I just wish I could do that all the time.
E: I liked that, too. Sing a little bit more. [It was good, but I wanted something different, so I asked her to sing it on [u] with the same wide jaw.] I liked the [u] better. Did you like that? 
T: Yeah, it was easy.
E: So that could be a good vowel to practice on, but if it gets tight or uncomfortable, change it to any other vowel. When you get the point that it feels really free and easy to sing on [u], you could add a consonant, like [n] or [d].
Lesson reactions: I feel like the whole lesson was talking. Tali had a lot of questions and concerns and misconceptions about breathing and her body, though, so I felt like I needed to clear up some of the language she used so she didn't have a weird idea in her head. We did a lot of work with her body, which I haven't done before. I felt like it was important to spend the time on her questions, but I felt like I maybe dwelt too long on some of it and talked too much. I don't know! I want to spend more time vocalizing because I feel like she needs the opportunity to feel a lot of different things, that she's only felt a narrow range of what her voice could do. Her speaking voice has a lot of dynamic and range contrast, so if she could just make the connection between speech and singing she'd be much more versatile. (Ha, ha, as I type this, I think of myself as a singer.) I thought the [tu-to] or [ti-tu] exercise was good for her to have to move quicker and a little less carefully. Because it was a longer vocalize, it seemed that she had to commit more to the doing rather than the thinking. When I asked her to sing her song with her jaw extremely wide open, the sound changed quite a bit, indicating to me that a lot of her difficulty could be with the jaw and neck tension that she's implementing. I could use some more ideas for jaw releasing exercises for her. Tali was more hopeful this lesson than last, and as always, a great student, but I'm still afraid I'm not meeting her needs. I want for her to improve quickly, just as she does, but I'm slow at knowing what to do and how to help.